I have noticed that people tend to spend money in relation to how much they make. And as an example, my parents both worked before any of us children came along and they said they never felt like they had money. Now my dad works off and on as a self employed carpenter and with 9 people in the house we probably live better. There are times we feel it but since we are together as a family most of the time , we can work though it, and everyone contributes.
Since my mom stayed home, she home schooled, cooked food from our large garden (which we were able to grow because she stayed home),and was able to discipline us when we needed it,(me especially

).
We saved money on gas, insurance, maintenance, and repairs for an extra car. We also saved because ,as I mentioned before, she cooked all our meals until us kids could cook. The other thing is the garden that we had, that mom and us kids did most of which saved on food costs.
Because of all this we were able to live comfortably on a surprisingly low income and have never used any money from the government in any form (that I can think of).
You have a hard and important decision before you but I believe that this stage in a child is when it is most important to spend time with them and to build the relationship.
You will never be able to relive this time in their life again.
I am not a father but I hate to see kids that spend more time with "babysitting" type organizations than with their own parents and I think this effects the relationship with their parents later.
Take care and good luck