I live in MO as well and usually when we lose power its only for a short time (20min to a few hours) but several years ago we had a bad ice storm that caused power outages for large portions of several counties. It was out for a week at my house, and some areas more like three weeks. You couldn't buy batteries much less a generator, and many gas stations couldn't pump fuel.
My thought was to have a generator large enough to run the well pump (5kw to start it according to our well guy), wash and dry clothes (electric dryer) shower, keep the fridge going etc. We have wood heat so for me I'd only run it no more than 5-6hrs per day total.
I bought a used 12/15KW PTO generator with drive shaft and 220v/50a cord, and mounted it on a 3pt carry all for a total of about $900. I've tested it on everything in the house including a 4Ton AC unit and it will run it all, just not at the same time. I also keep about 50 gallons of diesel in the barn with a 12V pump I run from the tractor or truck battery, this is my summer mowing fuel and if needed fuel to power the generator. I can store up to 150 gal if needed.
Your 23hp tractor will run a generator this large (if that's PTOhp), look at
this model it's what I have and produces good stable power. I like my PTO setup because its plenty of power, no extra engine to maintain and since I use the tractor on a regular basis I know it will start in any weather. Every fall I power the house with it for a couple of hours and know its ready if needed.
On your concerns:
Tractors are made to run many hours continuously under heavy loads like mowing, and generating power will likely be an easier task since the load is usually less than what the generator is capable of anyway. It is nice to have reserve power for peaks however.
On wearing your tractor out: If I lost power for 7 days and ran the generator 6 hrs per day I'd put 42hrs on the tractor. With good maintenance tractors will run for thousands of hours, mine was built in 1997 and currently has about 950hrs on it. I have zero worries about wearing it out while generating power.
On tying up the tractor while generating power: I can plow my 1/8 of a mile drive and circle in a couple of hours or use it to move downed trees or other debris, and generate power when I'm done. I have
these on my lift arms and can unhook from the generator and hook up to the blade in a few minutes each. Not an issue for me, but your needs may be different.
If you want something your wife can run by pushing a button get a whole house standby generator. For me however, I wouldn't even think about generating power until its been out for hours, appears like its not coming back for hours longer and we actually need to do something that requires it.
Hope this helps and good luck